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New
Year Expectations
By Ed Rigsbee, CSP
(1330 Words)
How did you celebrate the beginning of the New
Year?
Did you simply stay home and take it easy, attend a huge celebration or travel
to an exotic location? Did the celebration meet your expectations? In my
opinion, how you bring in the New Year is far less important than what
you plan to do in it!
As a child, I remember looking forward to Easter.
This was when I got a new pair of shoes and new clothes for Easter Sunday. One
year, it didn’t happen. I didn’t get my new shoes and clothes. I was
completely disappointed, and to this day I carry that memory. While I do not let
the memory immobilize me, it’s still there. People, organizations, places and
events can easily fall short of one’s expectations. Often expectations of
others are unrealistic.
Perhaps you might have similar memories in your
brain’s old tape file. If you do, hopefully you don’t let them immobilize
you. What about your New Year’s eve experience? Was it what you
thought it would be? How did you feel when there was no bolt of lightning in the
sky to usher another thousand years of Western civilization? This “feeling”
of unfulfilled expectations can cause a myriad of complications in your life if
you allow it to. When did you last allow unfulfilled expectations to immobilize
you? How did you get out of your funk?
Life can be quite challenging when your expectations
are not met. What are your expectations for the New Year? Expectations
come in all forms, for your business, for yourself and for others, just to name
a few. Since you really do not have control over others, I’d suggest that you
don’t put much energy there. Where you do have control is over your own
behavior decisions. Your behavior choices set both an example and expectations.
What behavior decisions will you rethink?
It is the behavior decisions in our lives that
determine our achievement, not the perceived limitations, like the childhood
memories I mentioned earlier. Or, even worse, what some ill intentioned teacher
might have told you about your “limited capabilities” back in high school or
some other institution. With this said, what are the possibilities for the next
thousand years? Who knows? More importantly, what are your possibilities for the
next twelve months? You are accountable to fulfill your own expectations. As a
business owner, manager or executive, you also are accountable to assist your
employees in achieving their expectations. What will you do differently in the
New Year?
At the schools my sons attend, large banners are
posted by the school district with their motto, “High Expectations = High
Achievement”. I suspect these are really posted for the benefit of the
district’s teachers. If the teachers have high expectations of their students,
then hopefully they will also have high expectations of themselves. With high
expectations of themselves, the teachers will deliver the kind of quality
education necessary for their students to excel. Then, and only then, can the
students reach their own expectations. Think about yourself as the teacher and
your employees as the students. What could you do differently that would create
value for your employees?
Frequently, in my seminars, I’ll tell attendees
that the definition of insanity is doing what you’ve always done but expecting
different results. The dawning of every New Year is a wonderful opportunity to
make new behavior decisions. The break makes change psychologically easier. The
subconscious accepts the new decision easier. What new behavior decisions will
you make?
High on my list of recommendations is adopting the
behavior I like to call the Partnering Paradigm. This is a paradigm of synergy
through cooperation. It applies to your business expectations both externally
and internally. It also applies to your external and internal personal
expectations. In business, seek external partners to develop strategic
alliances. Select partners that have complimentary core competencies to those of
your company. This will give all involved the best chance for developing
synergies that will create value. Internal to your company, look for new
strategies to help your employees have the Emotional Ownership necessary to act
as if they were an owner, to take intelligent risks essential for business
growth. See my article titled; Praise for
a Job Well Done (www.rigsbee.com) for
low and no cost employee recognition ideas.
To help your employees develop alignment with your
vision, find your company’s stories. Look for your stories that illustrate the
behaviors you wish to be repeated. Retell these stories regularly to reinforce
desired behaviors. Make the stories part of your culture. Achieving a successful
shift in company culture takes time, please be patient. What changes would you
like to make in your company’s culture?
The person you choose to be is the key to all that
I’ve been saying. Your internal conversations that you have with yourself are
what determine your behavior decisions. To achieve your personal expectations,
you must control your behavior. When someone says, “They made me do it.” My
rebuttal is usually; “I don’t think so!” Unless there is some kind of a
chemical or hormonal imbalance in your physical body, YOU CONTROL YOUR BEHAVIOR.
If you do have a physiological problem, seek professional help and let those
around you know what’s happening. They will be more tolerant, patient and
understanding.
In your personal life you also have internal (to
the family) behavior issues. I find this a regular challenge in my own life.
Both balance issues and how I interact with my family. I frequently catch myself
allowing the communication with my teenage son to be mostly negative in dealing
with my expectations of his behavior. As behavioral issues of children must be
handled, also positive relationship bank deposits must be made for their
emotional growth to take place. What personal behaviors must you adjust so you
can meet your own expectations?
The external behaviors I mentioned in your personal
life generally include extended family, friends and your community. How to you
treat people? How do you give of yourself? Year-round, I donate time in my
community as a youth soccer referee. How do you “show up” or personally get
involved in your community? You say you’re too busy? As a colleague, Ira
Blumenthal, (in reference to youth sports) says, “You can build fields or you
can build prisons.” Behavior decisions in your life define who you are, a
giver or a taker. We already have plenty of takers. What we really need is more
givers. If you aren’t already, will you become a giver?
I’ll not ask you to make a New Year’s
Resolution because most resolutions fade by Valentine’s Day, or sooner. My
hope for you though, is that like the Phoenix rising anew from the ashes of
devastation, you allow the New Year to be your symbol for change and
rebirth. Never again in your lifetime will you have such a symbolic opportunity
for renaissance. The decision of indecision is for the pathetic. William
James, in The Principles of Psychology
(1892) stated, “There is no more miserable human being than one in whom
nothing is habitual but indecision.”
The decision to
adopt a new Partnering behavior can create enormous value in many areas of your
life. In business, new synergies (the sum of the whole is greater than the sum
of the parts) will become possible. These synergies will become evident both
externally and internally. In you personal life, a new Partnering (or
cooperation) behavior will bring you closer to the ones you love and care about.
You will also find a new feeling of balance in your life.
So, what are your
expectations? Will you resolve to make the behavior decisions necessary to
satisfy your expectations? What are my expectations? I’ll tell you. This year,
I expect to double, from last year, the number of people I help in making new
and different behavior decisions for their lives. I wish you the best of success
in making notable behavior decisions.
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Ed Rigsbee, CSP is the
author of PartnerShift, Developing
Strategic Alliances and The
Art of Partnering. Rigsbee has over 1,000 published articles to his
credit and is a regular keynote presenter at corporate and trade
association conferences across North America. He can be reached at
800-839-1520 or EdRigsbee@aol.com,
or www.rigsbee.com. To
access helpful additional information from Ed Rigsbee at no charge,
please visit www.rigsbee.com/downloadaccess.htm.
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